The problem is that movies are delusional. and it's not even the Disney phenomenon, either. There are thousands - no, hundreds of thousands - of real life boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy gets girl scenarios. That is not the issue. Here's the issue, and it hit me as I was thinking of Pitch Perfect.
So here's to getting over myself, dropping the movie ideas and finding someone I appreciate spending time with. And if he enjoys spending time with me, I'm good. And if it doesn't work out and he shrugs and decides it was for the best, than it was. And I'm going to be cool with that.
PS: anyone ever realize how Jesse just forgives Becca for being a total conceited, cold bitch as soon as she starts singing that song about someone going dancing with her if she asked him to? Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's unrealistic. And I thought Skylar Astin was really cute and sweet until he played a character that lacked, um, balls. (I actually had to IMDb those names, because in my head she's the "hot chick with a creepy smile and too many teeth" and he's the "weirdly cute guy that... oh wait isn't attractive anymore, since he can't hold a grudge".)
The problem with movies is not that there are not enough strong woman, or that they teach women that they need a full armour to be brave and strong, or even about the Bechdel test.
It's not about instant gratification, or trying to find some guy as good-looking AND as thoughtful AND as smart AND as balanced as all the heros in the movies, it's about the fact that in every movie, the hero or heroin encounters a problem, suggests something, which is rejected by the vast majority, leaves in a fit of fury and/or sadness and/or loneliness or is chased in a fit of fury and/or rage and/or jealousy, and then is begged to come back, and gracefully does so at the condition that everything goes their way, at which point the original suggestion turns out to be a fantastic idea and everyone acclaims him/her.
And what have we learned? We learned that in order to be appreciated we must be needed beyond pride.
I've realized that is what I've been waiting for. I've been waiting for someone to "love" me enough to need me instead of only enjoying time with me. Until now and probably for at least the near future, I've been under the impression that in order to be happy with someone, I need them to love me more than they love themselves, which, let's be honest here, is really, really conceited.
So here's to getting over myself, dropping the movie ideas and finding someone I appreciate spending time with. And if he enjoys spending time with me, I'm good. And if it doesn't work out and he shrugs and decides it was for the best, than it was. And I'm going to be cool with that.
PS: anyone ever realize how Jesse just forgives Becca for being a total conceited, cold bitch as soon as she starts singing that song about someone going dancing with her if she asked him to? Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's unrealistic. And I thought Skylar Astin was really cute and sweet until he played a character that lacked, um, balls. (I actually had to IMDb those names, because in my head she's the "hot chick with a creepy smile and too many teeth" and he's the "weirdly cute guy that... oh wait isn't attractive anymore, since he can't hold a grudge".)
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